We weren't...

So I know things didn't go as planned... Weren't we supposed to be the people that everyone was jealous of? I gave lame excuses. For every thing, actually. The was I acted, saying no all of the time, was the worst thing I could have done. I could have just explained myself. I never realized how stupid our little fights were. We would argue about the most minuscule bull shit. I ruined one of the greatest things that ever happened to me  because I let my pride get in the way. I always did that. Then I always felt really guilty. I'm glad I felt guilty. I hate the fact that I miss you so much. So many things remind me of you. Almost all if my music, movies, every spider, oh my gosh, every pair of tighty whities. So much. We had so many memories. Every time Kings of Leon comes on and I hear "Sex on Fire" I remember talking to you about how the song was about chlamydia. And We The Kings. Seriously. Every single song. Whenever any of their songs come on I get flooded of memories of us. Disneyland reminds me of you. The Little Mermaid even reminds me if you. I can't even handle this anymore. It isn't worth fighting for. Like, I'm not saying that I want it to go back to normal, but I want to talk to you. I want to be like we used to, but I know you don't, but I still want to talk. I already said that! I suck at this. I'm not even trying to do anything. I'm just trying to spark up a conversation. I guess... You know what's funny to me? If I wrote a letter to someone it usually takes a lot of time and effort for me to get to the bottom of the page. But with this letter I ran out of room way too fast. I have so much to think about with you. There is so much I could say to you. I never thought that I would find someone like you, let alone become close to or lose. I'm sorry. I lied before. I was totally ungreatful and I didn't realize how much you meant to me until you were out of my grip. 

Love,

Franni. 

P.S. I should have said yes.